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June 1, 2005 Wednesday
Final Edition

SECTION: CITZ; Pg. C9

LENGTH: 474 words

HEADLINE: Being unhappy is OK, acting unhappy is not: talk-show host: Dennis Prager was the keynote speaker at an event attended by about 350 people to honour the late lawyer and banker David 'The Bear' Kardash, reports Carrie Kristal-Schroder.

BYLINE: Carrie Kristal-Schroder, The Ottawa Citizen

BODY:

If you're unhappy, don't go whining to Dennis Prager: He says while most people might feel pity for the unhappy, he feels only condemnation.

The well-known syndicated radio show host, author, writer and lecturer was in Ottawa last night speaking to a rapt audience of about 350 people at Machzikei Hadas Synagogue on the topic of happiness, the subject of his best-selling book, Happiness is a Serious Problem.

"The only happy people I know are people I don't know well," said Mr. Prager, the keynote speaker at an evening in memory of the late Ottawa lawyer and baker David "The Bear" Kardash.

"Because as soon as you know someone well, you'll know how much pain they've had in their lives."

But even though we may feel unhappy -- which is OK, said Mr. Prager -- the big sin is acting unhappy. And although he believes people should work on their feelings to become happier, he thinks faking it is a good start because "I do believe that if you act happy you'll become happy."

"It's selfish to be unhappy, and I know some people will have to work harder at being happy than others," said Mr. Prager, who said he used to view happiness as a selfish pursuit. Now he believes just the opposite.

"But you owe it especially to your family to be happy because they're the ones you spend the most time with."

Mr. Prager, who hosts a religious radio talk show syndicated on more than 80 stations, acknowledged the difficulty and the hard work that it takes to be happy.

"Don't give in to the self-pity humans can so easily indulge in, you have to keep working on it," said Mr. Prager, who views happiness not only as a moral, but as a religious imperative.

And religious people who are unhappy are the worst, according to Mr. Prager.

"I know an immense number of religious people of all faiths who are unhappy. And either there's a problem with their religion or they're doing it wrong," said Mr. Prager.

"I believe God made us to enjoy life. Why else would he have put us in this world?" said Mr. Prager, adding that one important distinction between Judaism and Christianity was that Judaism emphasizes happiness.

"For Jews, suffering stinks," he said.

Mr. Prager also spoke to the audience about what it means to be successful and had a message that likely appealed to young people in the audience.

"I've never put a moment's pressure on my kids to get good grades or go to a good school. I tell kids, 'It's not your happiness your parents are looking for, it's your success -- although they mean well," he said.

Ellen Greenberg, sister of David Kardash, was among those who came to hear Mr. Prager speak and said the topic would have suited her brother to a T because David always wanted everyone to be happy. "Dennis Prager was truly inspiring tonight," said Ms. Greenberg. "I suspect his talk on happiness has opened the light for many people in the room tonight."

GRAPHIC:
Photo: Stephen Shugerman, Getty Images; Radio host Dennis Prager told the audience that the only happy people he knows are those he doesn't know well.

LOAD-DATE: June 1, 2005