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Orange County Register
Want happiness? Stop chasing it, Prager says
Review: In a new book, the L.A. talk host finds the main obstacle
to being happy is . . .
By Brad Stetson
Special to The Orange County Register
February 22, 1998
Dennis Prager is a man of paradoxes. His public persona is that
of a talk radio host, yet he is also an erudite Jewish theologian.
With callers to his show (noon - 3 PM weekdays on KABC/790 AM)
he has a genial and unassuming demeanor, but his opinions are carefully
stated and skillfully defended. His voice is heard free in Southern
California for three hours daily, even though he is a polished,
internationally sought-after lecturer.
This penchant for irony is on display in Prager's newest book, "Happiness
Is a Serious Problem." Though the book is seemingly about
everything, it's short and easy to read. Though Prager's purpose
is to help human beings be happier, he asserts that it is human
nature itself - its insatiability - that is the greatest obstacle
tohappiness. Additionally, though Prager sees happiness as a universal
human desire, he says people cannot acquire it by direct pursuit.
In his view, it can only be gained by cultivating other values
that must be held to be more important than happiness itself. Examples
of such values would be depth of personality, wisdom, clear self
understanding and goodness.
The book's structure starts with Prager's premises about happiness,
which include his basic contention that happiness is nothing less
than a moral obligation. This is so because if we're happy, we
are mere likely to be enjoyable company for our family and friends.
In addition, happy people will generally treat others more decently
than will those who are plagued by unhappiness and personal discontent,
Prager contends.
As he later explains, "Happiness is important to doing good.
Unhappy people are usually less capable than happy people of doing
good. For one thing, they are usually too preoccupied with themselves
and their unhappiness to do much good for others, their unhappiness
can easily cloud their judgment. And finally, when unhappy people
try to help others by founding or joining social movements, they
often do more harm than good. There are good reasons to fear social
movements made up of unhappy people who want to bring about social
change."
The book's second part is an extended discussion of impediments
to happiness and how to deal with them. From constantly comparing
ourselves to others, to equating happiness with professional success,
to seeing oneself as a victim, to habitually focusing on what we
don't have rather than being grateful for what we do, Prager holds
that the barriers to happiness can virtually always be overcome
by understanding one's life to have meaning and purpose.
In his concluding section, Prager presents the attitudes and behaviors
he sees as essential to happiness. Beyond the nurturing of belief
in the meaning and purpose of one's life - best accomplished, Prager
suggests, through religion - the prescriptions he offers center
on the development of personal maturity.
Accepting the inevitability of tension in life, practicing self-control,
carefully selecting and maintaining friendships, demonstrating
true gratitude and consistently seeking to do good in the world
are among the intellectual and moral equipment need by everyone
for the journey to authentic and enduring happiness.
This is one of those rare books so dense with compelling insight
that every page will likely give pause for reflection. While Prager's
writing style can be stilted and mechanical, he is unfailingly
clear, and expert at demystifying the brew of emotions, desires
and thoughts that impair our ability to understand ourselves. Those
searching for personal clarity, then, will be grateful for Prager's
distillation of his three decades of sustained reflection on the
helps and hindrances to human happiness.
Indeed, it is very hard to imagine anyone reading this volume and
not gleaning some significant guidance to their own human quest
for happiness. That is a remarkable accomplishment for any book,
especially one as accessible as this one.
Prager summarizes his examination of happiness in this way: "The
pursuit of happiness is a noble human endeavor, no less so than
any other. It is an art that demands no less proficiency than playing
a Bach sonata. It is an accomplishment no less worthy than climbing
a great mountain. It involves constant use of the mind and constant
self-discipline. The route to its attainment confers wisdom and
inculcates gratitude. And given its moral ramifications, happiness
is no less moral am imperative than, let us say, democracy."
In sum, thoughtful and worthwhile.
Brad Stetson directs The David Institute, a social research
group in Tustin. His latest book is "Human dignity and
Contemporary Liberalism," just released by Prager Publishers. |
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